The truth about getting a service dog

 I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT GETTING A SERVICE DOG

Let there be no doubt; I love this dog.

I love Tintin so much. 

There is no way of describing it.

But I am gonna try anyway. 

Because things have not been easy

I got Tintin the 19/7 2021. 

And I will be honest; I had a hard time bonding with him in the beginning. 

It came to a point, where I was asked by the coach if I wanted to deliver him back. 

And I THANK GOD THAT I SAID NO!

Before I got my service dog I told the coaches that I really wanted a female dog, because I thought that I might have a hard time bonding with a male dog because of my PTSD. When they presented me for Tintin, I almost said no; because I wanted a girl. 

But then I would have to wait even longer, so I said yes to give Tintin a shot. 

And when I met him, he was so awesome, calm and sweet. And I gave them the green light to go ahead and deliver him to me as my service dog. 

THIS WAS BIG. 

All male energy is difficult for me. 

And when he was delivered at my doorstep a month later I told myself, that I was ready. 

But was I really? 

I felt that he loved me immediately. And it made me so sad.  Because I did not love him. 

[Excuse me while I cry]

I felt like caring for him, feeding and walking him. 

But ultimately I felt like I had a “postpartum depression”

It was so hard to give him a proper life. 

I went from lying down all hours of the day. 

Being sick.

Barely caring for myself 

        to

Having the life of another being in my hands. 

It was difficult. So difficult. 

And when you at the same time is doubting if you will ever come to love this being, things might seem to be more than you can handle. They did for me. 

So when the coach called I said: I dont know. 

She said: Do you want me to pick him up?

I said……: (Nothing)

Because yes. I wanted to give up. 

I was never going to love Tintin. 

And everyone said: He is magnificent. 

I couldn’t see it. 

They asked: Arent you in love? 

I said yes. 

But I wasn’t. 

But here comes the good part. 

Tintin has grown on me with time. 

He is really difficult to handle at times

He pulls the leash. A lot. 

And one night I came crying home to my parents from our evening walk

I didn’t cry no more because I didn’t love him. 

I cried because I was afraid that he would never be a good service dog. 

AND I WAS AFRAID TO LOSE HIM

I was so scared that he would be taken away from me, when the coaches found out all the difficulities I had with him. 

Suddenly

I 

LOVED

HIM

SO

MUCH

I love him so much it hurts me. 

I don’t want to lose him. 

I want him with me every day for the rest of my life. 

All I actually wanted to say is:

Getting a service dog is a lot of work

And you are sick

You might not love your dog right away

But hang in there! 

It will get better! 

I promise you.

It gets better!